Helping the Younger Women to be Keepers of their Homes
By Contributing Writer, Marci Ferrell
Several years ago when my daughter was married and we only had my son living at home with us, a Christian friend of mine asked me what I was going to do now that my kids were grown. I didn’t hesitate but answered that I was going to continue to live out the Titus 2 mandate. It is just assumed in our culture today that once your kids are grown you can go out and live your own life. Where is that in Scripture?
God’s Word calls me to continue in my role in teaching the younger women:
Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
Titus 2:3-5
Since this month we are talking about spring cleaning and organizing, my hope was to share with you how we can help our daughters and other younger women the Lord has put in our lives to manage their homes. Kelly had a great post that spurred me on to this topic as it sometimes seems like we are missing a generation of older women to help our young girls in caring for and being keepers of their homes.
My daughter and I are blessed to have a close relationship and also live in close proximity to one another. She is obviously the first on my list of young women to pour into and help when I can be of assistance. Amber has two under two so her days are busy. Spending time together and pouring into her a love for her home and family is a true joy. Our culture today doesn’t encourage our young women to delight in taking care of their family and home.
There is so much theology that takes place when you are cleaning or cooking together. It takes much time, energy, and effort to get your hands dirty and clean house, make meals, or watch little ones. Serving one another doesn’t get any accolades and usually goes unnoticed.
Since I’m in the older women category I’m speaking to us today. Are you a mother or grandmother that has family close by that you can be a blessing to? Are you an older woman that can minister to the younger women in your church? Can you rearrange your schedule to be a help to these women the Lord has placed in your life? You are not finished with the Lord’s work when your children are grown and leave the home. You are still called to teach the younger women (Titus 2:3-5).
I love lists and examples so my easiest way to share what this may look like is to give examples. Some of these ideas are from my own life but also from surveying younger women in our churches on how to help them in being ”keepers of their homes”.
Living it out:
- Work alongside her in cleaning house.
- Help her with scheduling her days. Encourage her so she is not living day to day in chaos but there is some semblance of order in her home.
- Clean her house for her while she is busy with little ones.
- Communication has changed a bit from the phone attached to the wall so utilize Facebook and texting to catch up on how she is doing or to send an encouraging note.
- Don’t forget to let her know when she is doing something right. Their days are long with little ones and it can be so refreshing to hear what they are doing right.
- Watch her children if she needs some time to get some chores or errands done.
- Help with organizing cupboards, closets, laundry etc.
- Just spend time with her in your home so she can learn alongside you. Some of my best homekeeping skills have come from watching others.
- Have young families over for dinner. Many times they don’t get asked to people’s homes because they have little ones—so what a blessing to cook for them and minister to them for an evening. Send them home with the extra food :).
- Watch their children while they grocery shop.
- Cook them a meal and deliver it. Keep extra food on hand in your freezer to send home when they are over for a visit.
- When you’re heading to the store give them a call to see if they need anything.
- Share recipes and cleaning tips.
- Keep the kids so mom and dad can have a date night. Having their children for an overnight is a special treat. Many young couples today do not live near their parents so being able to getaway for an overnight or weekend is a rare event.
- If your budget allows, pick up a special gift, book, or kitchen item as a special treat.
- Direct them to the Word of God often.
- My favorite saying to my daughter is “Do the Next Thing“. She says that pops up in her mind often and keeps her going.
- Share a skill set they would like to learn – baking bread, canning, sewing, knitting, gardening etc.
- Help them with time management.
- Encourage them to take the time to memorize God’s Word. (Psalm 119:11). Ask her specifically how you can pray for her and take time to pray with her when you are together.
- Remind them of the importance of their role as a wife and mother as laid out in God’s Word.
God has ordained the home to be the wife’s domain. How can we help and be an example to the younger women He has place in our lives to be a “worker at home?”
One expression in Titus 2 deserves special notice. It is the word homemakers. The Greek word is oikourgous, which literally means “workers at home.” Oikos is the Greek word for “home,” and ergon means “work, employment.” It suggests that a married woman’s first duty is to her own family, in her own household. Managing her own home should be her primary employment, her first task, her most important job, and her true career.
John MacArthur
How are you an encouragement to the younger women in fulfilling the high calling of being a wife and mother?
Tags: homemaking
Thank you, Marci!!!!!!! I wish all older (you don’t look very old, but for the sake of argument, ok) women would take Titus 2 to heart. I am so sorry to say, many in the older generation have dropped the torch.
You are so sweet Dianne
My husband and I were chatting how when we were first married I had family close by to learn from and ask questions. We didn’t have the Internet to do a quick Google search so I depended on advice from the older women in my life but they were also home keepers so they were available and accessible. So many women aren’t home anymore and don’t have the time to pour into these younger women. I pray the older women in the church will step up and our younger women will seek them out and have teachable hearts. Thank you for your encouragement today.
As one of those women in the middle (old enough to pour time and talent into younger women but still in need of good Titus 2 mentoring myself), I found this so encouraging! I do not have children of my own, and I try to be there helping and encouraging those who do.
As many have said, there really is a need for more older women to take up that Titus 2 role. I know many women of my generation who are feeling God’s call to be keepers at home, but most of the older women around us still see home only as the place you keep when the children are small. The young women in your life are so fortunate to have you there, and I’m so thankful for the advice you give online!
Amy I am still missing that next generation in this stage of my life to seek for guidance and mentoring. I continue to pray and seek for those older women in my life. My daughter and the younger women bless me so much as I am sure you are a huge blessing to the women in your life.
This post made me so excited!! I love the idea of learning from older, Titus 2 ladies. I so appreciated this post and I agree with the comment above saying that “I wish all the older women would take Titus 2 to heart”. How I wish that was true, too! But, I am thankful to have a wonderful example and teacher in my own mother- someone who loves the Lord and being home with her family. It is a blessing, rare to find today. I believe that it is so important for younger women to learn from older women, as there is always something to learn. It is also fun to learn things together. Last year, my mom, sister and I tried canning for the first time. We had loads of fun doing it and learning it together.
I am also thankful for examples, like yourself, whose love for the Lord and family, homemaking and being a Titus 2 example shine through even though we do not know each other in person. That is a special blessing! You can learn so much from someone even just through blogging. The internet is a wonderful modern-day convenience that I am very thankful for.
Love and blessings to you,
Libby
Libby you are such a gem and it is so good that you and your sister work and learn alongside your mother.
You have given me an idea for reaching out to a young woman who has been on my mind for a while! This is such an important ministry that each one of us can and should be thinking about as our families ‘take flight’! There is always a new bride or young new mother that we can ‘take under our wing’, even if we are only in our 30s or 40s. Great insights!
True Titus 2 women are such a tremendous blessing! I have been blessed to have a dear friend who lives near by and is such an encouragement all the time. She added texting as a feature on her cell phone simply because that’s the easiest way to communicate when I have a houseful of noisy children. She comes frequently just to rock a baby or read to my others or to help me catch up on laundry. Just having her presence offers a peace of mind. She also comes early once a month a cares for all six of our children while I have a day with my husband at his work!! This has been tremendous! I get to have a date, get errands run and school/menu planning done all at once! Not that I’m anxious for my children to be grown at all, but being the recipient of such blessing gets me so excited about blessing other young mothers in the same ways I’ve been blessed when my children are grown!
This is a beautiful post that is spot on! There have been many times I longed for an older woman of God to encourage and teach me some things. One particular time was when I had only been married a few years. I was messing things up miserably and asked 3 women in particular to help me. Each one turned me down for various reasons!!! I was crushed! Out of that though, I learned to lean more heavily upon the Lord. Also, I was given a passion to mentor younger women myself, hence the beginning of my own blog among some other wonderful opportunities. Thanks for the list by the way! It’s a great resource!