Male/Female Relationships in the Church

Practical Theology for Women
January 9, 2016

Yet, as any single woman who walks into an evangelical church knows, sometimes it feels like not much with the opposite sex is left for her at all. She has to avoid making eye contact or smiling too much with pretty much every man in the church for fear of being thought of as forward or too interested. I hear this from a lot of women and have experienced it myself. Our sex-crazed secular culture has radically infiltrated the church, and our battles against it have often made us hyper aware of sex instead of giving us a counter cultural way of thinking about male/female relationships in the Body of Christ.

I loved this article from Wendy Alsup.

I Don’t Pray My Kids Will Do Great Things for God Anymore

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I used to pray my kids would grow up to do great things for God. I grew up and didn’t do anything great for God, but maybe my role was to be the MOTHER of people who did great things for God. So I prayed for that. What my kids do for God isn’t what burns in my belly anymore.

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“The healing path plunges us into the depths of our doubt, where a new faith can be born. This faith, birthed in the desert and the valley, frees us to remember a past not only with loss, but with redemption. It leads us to a perspective that is full of God, therefore deepening our trust that redemption will dawn tomorrow as it did once before. First, however, this process often confronts us with who or what we really have been trusting rather than God.”

Dan Allender

A Cry for Justice
December 18, 2015

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“Subverting the meaning of the real 10 commandments to foster worship of an institution that will pass away when Christ returns, is the height of purveying the false gospel that marriage is to be esteemed and honored above God himself.”

This is an important article. Read it HERE.

Get a Free Downloadable PDF of Deal Breakers to Share (And other stuff I’m writing and reading about.)

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I’ve disappeared again! I know! Here’s why: This is my company’s busiest time of the year, so I’m working more hours on that. We are having our first ever open house at the end of November, so if you live near the Twin Cities area and want to stop in to say “hi” – I’d […]

Five Things I Thought I’d Never End

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Here are five things I build my identity around that I never thought I’d end. And then I did. I'm planning to tell you a story that is so prevalent and so painful it is effectively split off from the emotional lives of young women, tucked away into whatever neural recesses prevail for the objective of shelving information that feels irrelevant yet distantly threatening. I wonder if young women will read this? The irony is that they probably won't, and the silently nodding heads will be ones that are graying, like mine. The blog at https://blog.butterflyagelessbeauty.com can tell you more


After passing out of childhood years and into the age of puberty, I, like most women, entered a three-decade phase of my life that included an age of puberty and young adulthood that was peppered with the sexual abuse, sexism in the workplace, mommy wars, pay gaps, and gendered put-downs that few females escape. It was a significant chunk of time. The concerns feminism undertook during those years were critical, and they continue to be. I am grateful to all the women and men who fought and continuously champion women's fairness, reproductive rights, and freedom from brutality and harassment. It is gutsy and necessary work.

But then something happened, and if not for the mirrors in my house, I would be very confused about what shifted and why. Young women, you'll experience this too, some day. You'll catch your reflection and your breath at the same time and be abruptly reminded that your facade no longer matches how you feel inside, and that it now undermines the power of your voice, the tone that took ten years to build up. I was discussing this to a good friend recently who is 49, one year younger than I am. She said, "Oh wow. I remember my grandma telling me the exact same thing about being surprised by her appearance in the mirror because she still felt like a young woman inside, and she was 80." So this most likely will not end for me, nor for any of us given the gift of not dying early. It bears keeping in mind.