One of the first “things as they are” facts you need to learn is that it is impossible to correct, change, alter, redefine, censure, sweet-talk, or reason with a fool. Let me say that again: It is impossible. If you take nothing else away from this chapter, then at least hang on to this truth: If you try to change your fool, you will fail! Get that, my friend, and get it well. If you do, then you will be able to successfully foolproof your life.
The Bible says, “Understanding is a fountain of life to him who has it, but the discipline of fools is folly” (Proverbs 16:22, NASB). In other words, any attempt to correct a fool is useless because “discipline” is foolishness to one who despises wisdom, mocks at guilt, and starts quarrels. This is the great dividing line: If discipline does nothing to change the fool, then your focus must be on you and your “understanding.” Wisdom must become your goal and your hope. It must be your safe haven and your delight.
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This first paragraph states so strongly that the fool will never change but I Peter 3:1-2 says that he (assuming the fool is your husband) may be won (that’s a change) without a word by the chaste and respectful behavior of a submissive wife. And the second paragraph says that ‘any attempt to correct a fool is useless’ but Prov.26:5 says to answer a fool as his folly deserves that he not be wise in his own eyes. I think it’s exactly what you were saying before-we have to have a living, praying, seeking, humble, personal relationship with the Lord to know when to do which and how
Just as it is wrong to constantly nag and manipulate a foolish husband and hope to change him by our own efforts, it is also wrong to give up on him as an impossible case. Consider how God deals with fools in II Peter 3:9-The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is *patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.*
Well, the quote is out of context with the book. But Proverbs is pretty clear that if the person truly is a fool – by nature, they cannot change barring an intervention of God. And I don’t believe 2 Peter is referring to fools – but rather to the human race in general.
I did a speed-read of this book years ago. GREAT BOOK! It can be very freeing for someone who has to deal with a fool/fools on a regular basis.