“Your Daughter May be Born with Trisomy 21″
By Contributing Writer, Jennifer Ross
“Double bubble.” That’s what the ultrasound tech typed onto the screen over our unborn baby’s tummy. I glanced at my husband, we exchanged quizzical looks. ”Double bubble?” He asked the tech about it. She refused to answer any of our questions.
This was our 10th child and needless to say, I’ve had more than a few ultrasounds. We knew something was unusual. The 10 minute drive home was filled with questions.
- “What do you think that means?”
- “Do you think there is something wrong?”
- “Why wouldn’t she answer any of our questions?”
When we arrived home I wasted no time getting online and googling, “double bubble.”
Our findings? The first page answered our questions.
Down Syndrome.
Down Syndrome?
We met with our doctor the following day. “Well, congratulations, I hear you’re having a girl!” Yes, we found out too, we were being blessed with a daughter. “So, about the other findings… she has dunodenal atresia, and there is a possibility she has Down Syndrome. I’d like to send you for an additional high-sensitive ultrasound.”
The findings from that scan were confirmed as well.
Duodenal atrestia (or the “double bubble” the first tech noticed). And yes, we were having a baby girl as well as the possiblilty of Down’s. But they found something else as well… “Tetralogy of Fallot.” Basically, Tetralogy of Fallot, or TOF as they like to abreviate it, is a heart defect. Further indication our Jenna Mae was to be born with Down Syndrome.
On August 29, 2008 I gave birth to our 10th child at 38 weeks gestation. She was 5 lbs. 8 oz, sweet as can be and cute as a button. She had just as much hair as all our other children did at birth. But she had a few extra things the others didn’t have: Duodenal Atresia, Tetralogy of Fallot, fused toes and yes, Down Syndrome.
I held her for an hour that day, then my husband followed her and 2 hospital transporters to the NICU. She had her tummy fixed there, and she and I came home 3 weeks later. She had her heart repaired at 6 months old (image below), and has been fairly healthy ever since.
That is basically how it went.
- Shock that she had Down Syndrome? No.
- Anger that she had Down Syndrome? No.
- Sadness that she had Down Syndrome? No.
Seriously, no. I hear people say how mad they were when they learned they were having a child with “Downs.” I’ve heard other parents says “All the hopes and dreams we had for this child will never come true.” That’s not been our experience. Honestly, the only true hope we have for our children is that they will walk with our Lord, that they will be among the redeemed, and that their names will remain written in the Lamb’s book of life. And as far as I know, kids with Down Syndrome are not automatically omitted from God’s Kingdom because of their handicap.
90% of all children with Down Syndrome are aborted. Killed. 90% of all parents of children who have (or are thought to have) Down Syndrome are killed in the womb. Notice that I said children who “are thought” to have this syndrome are murdered. Yes, some of those aborted never had the dreaded “Down’s.”
Our Jenna has her struggles to be sure! And life with her is different than it was with the other “normal” children. I’ve been in the hospital with Jenna more than I’ve cared to, but terminating the life of our child was never an option. Ever.
A simple winter cold can, (and has) put her in the hospital with pneumonia in a heartbeat. (Image below of winter 2010). She has to be watched very carefully while eating as she can choke easily, and she’s got a stubborn streak like I’ve never seen on a 3 year old! But trials are what produce godliness in us, as all things work together for good. The Lord uses everything in our lives to conform us to His image.
I could tell you all so much more about her, but my point is this, she has life. She was created to live. It was never our right to terminate her life because of a mere handicap. Human life is paramount. The sanctity of life is paramount. We live in a culture of death.
“All those who hate Me love death.” Proverbs 8:36
We must choose life even when it’s an inconvenience. We must choose life even when its a “surprise.” And we must choose life when it’s imperfect.
“Choose this day whom you will serve… But as for me and my house we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15
Tags: abortion, Down's Syndrome, parenting, worldview
What an incredibly beautiful post. It brought tears to my eyes, and I’m so thankful for such edifying and truthful words–truly a message our culture needs to hear.
May the Lord bless you and your family, Jennifer!
Hi Joy! Thank you, your words are true. Our culture has been so deceived. It’s so sad!
Our 13-year-old daughter with DS is sweet, loving and kind. She loves the Lord and worships Him without any hinderance. She brings joy to others simply by being herself.
When I was pregnant with her and the doctors suspected Trisomy 21, I expressed fear to my husband. He told me that he hoped our daughter would have Down Syndrome because God could use her more with it. Recently, I asked my husband if he remembered saying this. He said he had no memory of it. But then, he said, “I don’t mean to be prideful, but I was right, wasn’t I?” He certainly was right.
Hi Bonnie! What an encouragement for us! I’ve always thought our Jenna would worship our Lord without any hinderance, just as you stated your daughter does (Praise God! He truly does use the weak of the world to confound the strong!) And I’m sure she can teach us a few things!! I honestly do look forward to her growing and sharing joy with everyone! Thank you for writing!
What a precious child she is! Thank you for this post and sharing your journey with Jenna. She’s a sweetheart!
Your story is very encouraging to all women (and men)!
Hello Gretchen, yes, she really is a sweetie! I’m so glad you were encouraged by her story! Bless you!
This is a beautiful testimony of God’s work in your life, Jennifer. Thank you for sharing.
With so many choosing to not be accepting of their child’s (possible or real) special-ness, I have to say Thank You for keeping on the path God has given you. I, too, have a special needs child (not DS, but 4 rare diagnoses in one child), and she is absolutely the sunshine in my day! And I have seen sooo many others who have learned so much from her, myself included. Keep up the good work. Embrace your daughter’s special-ness!
Thank you Kari! It wasn’t until we had our Jenna that I began to learn and realize just how many families abort these babies! Even as I wrote this post above, my husband reminded me, “Don’t forget to add that 90% of babies with Down Syndrome are aborted.” I honestly thought he was wrong! Thank you for your encouragement!
Beautiful pregnant belly! Beautiful baby! (What a healthy size she was already at only 6 months!) Beautiful faith & testimony! Thank you for sharing it for God’s glory!
She was born just 2 weeks early, and was by far our smallest baby! Our last one was over 10 lbs! I was so large because of her “duodenal atresia.” The amniotic fluid wasn’t cycling through as it should have. I just kept getting bigger, and bigger, and…!!
blessings!!!
Jennifer,
It means so much to get to know you more through your beautiful sharing if your family testimony, and the story of your precious little girl. May God bless you all (and direct you as you’re launching your new blog) in 2012. Thank you for your love for LIFE!!!
Ann
Thank you Ann!
Oh, she is just beautiful!
I have a niece that we were told would have Down Syndrome. My brother and his wife choose life for their little one. When she was born is was apparent that she had much more than Down Syndrome. She needed a ventilator and three years later she still needs it. Now we all look back and wish that she had something as simple as Down syndrome because the problems they face with her don’t even allow her to live at home but at a center. God has her in his hands and knows how long her time on earth is but it is difficult to watch them go through this. Your little girl looks so sweet!
This is such a challenging and encouraging post! When I was pregnant (before I miscarried at Christmas), my midwife said I should have a screen to check to see if the baby could have Down Syndrome. My husband and I chose not to because we knew that, if they did, it didn’t make a difference. Yet, I know in my heart that I have prejudices lurking there, and I’m so thankful for your post. Your daughter is beautiful and I love her girly country dress! Many, many blessings…