Once a month we plan to address a “Mail Bag” issue. If you have an idea or question you would like to be considered for the “Mail Bag” post, please send it to: [email protected].
The following is an excerpt of a note found in my e-mail box a few weeks ago:
My wife generally loves the Visionary Womanhood blog. She will often shoot me a link to go and read a post when she thinks I will be particularly interested. Several weeks ago she sent me a link and expressed real concern over the focus and direction of one blog posting in particular. Ironically your blog post from this week is philosophically in direct opposition to that previous post. The post that concerns me is: http://visionarywomanhood.com/post/ In the post the author makes it clear that what she has decided is wrong is the standard by which we should measure what is evil. Last time I checked the Bible does not mention Disney princesses. We can look at them as evil or we can see them as appealing to a longing within us for the true prince. I am not writing as an apologist for Disney. I just think that that particular post tended toward legalism and was really out of step with the usual appeal to turn your readers hearts toward God, with the goal that Godly discernment and right actions will follow.
I am a pastor and my wife is an active discipler. Our heart is to seek to direct people to passionately embrace a God focused life to their soul’s rejoicing for eternity. My wife normally recommends visionary womanhood to others but that post has really put a damper on her enthusiasm.
I wrote back to this person, but my response was returned as “undeliverable”, so I am going to address it here.
There are probably as many different personal convictions about various issues as there are Christians in the world. Let’s look at a sampling of examples:
• You can’t wear pantyhose.
• You can wear pantyhose…but not fish net style. Especially black. White is OK though.
• You can wear pantyhose as long as they don’t show.
• You can’t wear pants.
• You can wear pants if you are under 5 years old.
• You can wear pants if they are pink.
• You can’t wear earrings.
• You can wear earrings as long as they are clip ons…but no pierced ears.
• You can’t watch movies.
• You can watch movies if they have the gospel message explained.
• You can’t listen to Christian music with a drum beat.
• You can listen to Christian music with a drum beat as long as it is very slow. How slow? You know. Slow.
• You can’t have Disney princesses in your house.
• You can have Disney princesses in your house as long as you don’t watch movies about said princesses.
We could go on ad nauseum with this exercise and have such fun. We could also get into some topics that are a lot more personal to each one of us. And if I did mention them, some of you would write lovely comments, and others of you would unsubscribe to this blog and maybe send me an angry letter.
On that note, I might add that it is amusing to see the subscriber readership go up or down based on a single post. “Oh, I adore this…I agree with it 100%! I absolutely must subscribe!” Or….”This post is garbage! Suddenly this whole blog reeks like sour grapes, and I shall unsubscribe immediately!”
We Wemmicks are pretty fickle folk.
On this blog, we want to be careful to encourage obedience to God’s Word where the instructions are explicit. Where God’s Word teaches principles, such as the principle of keeping our homes in such a way that they glorify God, there is some wiggle room for people who are all on a different leg of their Christian life.
Some of our writers might feel that purging their homes of all Christian Pop music is important. Some might be Country Western fans. Some might ditch all things Disney. Some might not have any problem using a Disney DVD to babysit their children on a bad day.
The writer of the blog post, mentioned in the letter above, has personal convictions about Disney princesses. Why? Perhaps she found her own heart led astray as a child through playing with those types of things, and she feels convicted by the Holy Spirit to get rid of them. Maybe she was noticing some negative fruit in the heart of one of her children. We are not told why, nor do we need to know all the ins and outs of her conviction in that area. That’s her business, and I respect that.
She does state: “We recently went through our entire home, discarding items that did not glorify the LORD.” And then goes on to list a few examples…the offending princesses among others. Even though the Bible doesn’t specifically address Disney, Country Western music, and drinking soda pop (among a million other things), we must still make discerning judgement calls on whether or not those things are bringing glory to Christ or detracting from His glory in our own lives. Where does the discernment come from? Our own Wemmick feelings and opinions? Or the resultant thinking that comes from a life and heart saturated daily in God’s Word?
And then, back to the point of the article: sometimes we will want to do some “purging” of things that may cause us or our children to stumble. She then shares a personal example of how she has recently done that for her own family. She never once states that others must throw away Disney princesses.
We’ve become very adroit at crying, “LEGALIST ALERT!” every time we run across someone with convictions more stringent than our own. Remedy? Understand what legalism is…and isn’t. I recommend this blog article HERE. Under an accurate, Biblical definition of legalism, for the Disney Princess Dumper to be accurately pinned with the label of “legalist”, she would have to be telling others to dump THEIR Disney princesses too, lest they burn in hell.
God’s Word teaches us to be generous in our dealings with one another and not impose our own convictions about things that are not found in His Word…on others. And that slices both ways. If you feel someone is struggling with legalism (putting their personal convictions on others and claiming that those convictions are the difference between salvation and the lack thereof), then, by all means, pray for those poor Pharisaical souls.
But you don’t want to become a legalist by your own faulty definition, and put your personal convictions to embrace all those darling Disney princesses–on others. And why throw out friends when they disagree on minor points of interest?
Someone recently purchased the eBook, The Heart of Simplicity, and disagreed on one point made in one chapter that took up a few brief sentences. The book is almost 300 pages long, but because she wanted every single thing to be exactly as she saw it…she reacted negatively and even asked for a refund.
We Wemmicks have the expectation that just because we believe something or are convicted about something, that everyone else must fall into line with us. This tendency is precisely why we need the plumb line of God’s Word for every area of life. What we think is totally irrelevant. What our Maker thinks—well that’s another story.
My thought is that a mother should be free to throw away Disney princesses…and talk about it on the internet…without raising the ire of other Christians who happen to like Disney princesses. There are FAR more important issues rooted very explicitly in God’s Word that are being dismissed and glossed over today by Christians, (how about fornication, sodomy, and the murder of babies just for starters), while we mess around arguing about make-believe royalty.
I certainly hope minor disagreements like this will not hinder anyone from experiencing the benefit of the information and encouragement found on Visionary Womanhood as well as other worthwhile blogs. I don’t always agree with every single post on some of my favorite blogs. So? We are ALL simple Wemmicks…and need to extend grace to one another, understanding that God is doing His sanctifying work in each heart, in His own timing.
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Very well said! I woyld encourage every christian into looking up the word legalist and legalism as well it helps put things into perspective when we understand what the words mean. Thank for your post. I complwtley agree. May the Lord bless your ministry!
This is an AMAZING post. Well done; thank you for sharing.
I think this issue is multi-layered and lots of thoughts come to mind.
I agree that we can’t split hairs and must be discerning readers. That should be with everything we read, whether it be a blog post, a book or anything at all. And while I see no basis for this man’s argument *for* Disney princesses, I know there might be things on my family’s list of favorites that he might not agree with as well.
I also find this very telling because some of the very few negative comments I’ve had on my blog have been in regard to entertainment choices. Entertainment is a god in our culture—we live for it and “no one better interfere with what *my* choices are and where I draw the line.” We get our dander up more quickly about entertainment than we do about doctrine. But really, at the heart of everything, is doctrine. Our practices are an outworking of what we believe about God. (Orthopraxy matches orthodoxy)
Very good point about anyone who has stronger convictions than our own, is labeled a legalist. We have some friends, some good counselors, which have stronger convictions than we do in many areas. We have never seen legalism in them but a strong love for Christ and a desire to see their children live for Him, not wanting to be guilty of causing them to stumble in *any way*. We don’t see them as legalists but merely Christians who have been living the Christian life longer than we have and are more mature. However, we know of others who are constantly kicking the legalist rocks at them and disregarding them.
Anyone who knows the author of that post, would know that about her. She loves the Lord and wants to honor Him in the role she’s been called to—as she watches over the affairs of her household. That’s the trouble with blogposts or one isolated post—you can’t always see the person’s heart as well as you would if you knew them or read what they write the rest of the time.
That said, there is *no one* we will agree with on everything. Some can come close, but never fully. Some of my dearest brothers and sisters in the Lord don’t see eye to eye with me on all practical applications, but we can agree on the most important—the doctrines of our faith. That said we can’t use that as an excuse to let any and all convictions go…*we know we are His if we keep his commands.* But there must be balance…and love…and grace towards others who are still learning. Because we are *all* still learning something.
Several years ago I was in the home of a man; a prominent pastor and speaker to families about family life. I was surprised to see what I saw on the shelves of his family room. Movies and books that we don’t bring into our home. I didn’t agree with his entertainment choices, but I haven’t stopped listening to his teachings nor do I disregard him. He’s a very wise man. But #1 We ALL have blindspots (I have some, but I don’t know what they are. Others can see them, but I can’t, although I ask the Lord to show them to me!.) And #2 I would sooo be missing out if I let this one thing ruin the rest of what he has to say and how the Lord uses him in the lives of so many.
Press on!
Love this post! Thank you so much for sharing this- I just studied in Romans about this very thing- there were controversies among the Christians at that time about keeping certain days sacred and whether or not to eat meat (Romans 14).
The biggest things that I learned from this passage- and that you convey so beautifully above- in accepting people with different convictions on these “minor” points- we bring glory to God. God gives us freedom for diversity under the gospel in part, I believe, to remind us of what is truly important- we all need mercy and salvation through Jesus Christ.
We all have different convictions, and I am blessed many times by bloggers who share about the things that God has been convicting them about- it is an opportunity to examine my heart and say- Lord, do I need to take a look at eliminating or abstaining from this?
In that way we do encourage and strengthen one another by sharing how God is working in our hearts and lives.
God bless you and thank you for this fine response as we seek to live in unity in Christ.
I have to admit, I was a little cautious at the beggingin of your response-post, because I felt a little “defensiveness” and was afraid of a merely personal defense rather than Biblical defense, but I’m so glad I kept reading because you really said everything well and Biblically sound. Well said. Thank you for showing us the other side of the coin, it is an important one. I too am bothered by being labeled as “legalist” when I simply have convictions on things that within our family we feel to be pleasing or unpleasing to the Lord.
GREAT comments, Ladies. Lots of good stuff here. Thanks for taking the time to add some input on this issue. LOVE walking in His grace with all of you…
Wow. This was a very interesting email! My family recently went through this same issue of purging kid movies that we felt convicted by, some Disney included!(http://sharpeningarrowsandsowingolives.blogspot.com/2012/05/i-love-witchcraft.html) And I have to say that blogging about it definitely ruffled some feathers! Thank you for sharing the link to the original article, the email you received and the biblical response to it!
Blessings, Michelle