By Contributing Writer, Jennifer Ross
It was our anniversary, and I was about to receive the only thing I really wanted.
Six days prior, our daughter had been air lifted to Children’s Hospital three hours away from our home. Her runny nose had quickly turned into pneumonia, and she was suddenly very ill. The stress of a sick child and a segregated family is like no other trial a family can go through.
But that day came, our anniversary, and my husband called and said “we’re coming home!”
The LORD had healed our daughter, and in His graciousness, was sending her and my husband back to us! I am still *incredibly* grateful. It was late evening when they arrived home, and our reunion was sweet. The next morning we received a phone call.
The Trial
We hadn’t been up even an hour yet when one of my husband’s employees called and asked if we had gone to the job site last night. The job site? After a week in the hospital with our daughter, I wondered why he would think my husband had driven another hour past our home to visit the job site?
“Well…” he said “I was hoping he had come and gotten the tools.” My mind filled with confusion. No, of course he hadn’t. Not knowing what to say I responded with; “Why would he do that? He and Jenna just got home from the hospital.”
“I know,” He said. “And everything is gone.”
“Gone?” Yes, a week of anguish that ended on our anniversary – then a blessed night that ended in despair. My husband had been building a custom home, and all that he had was stolen. Everything. All the way down to the last hammer and extension cord. Everything. The business he’d spent the last 10 years building was gone in an instant.
It was the first of many trials that would continue throughout the next six months. I know that we are called to “count it all joy… when you meet trials of various kinds” (James 1:2), but just between you and me, this experience was anything but joyful!
The days passed and more trials came. Suddenly out of business, my husband was forced into another line of work. I would remind him daily that “blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial” (James 1:12), and that “God works all things together for good…” (Romans 8:28).
The Role of the Wife
He was the one being tried, and I was his pillar of strength. The role of “help meet” had never been so real for me. I encouraged him, prayed for him, reassured him, and gave him Bible verses that I hoped would bring him comfort. It was a difficult time, not in our marriage, but life in general.
What we learned is that sometimes the LORD uses drastic measures to grow us and guide us into what He needs us to be. He had something new for my husband and for our family; and as He molded my husband, He molded and shaped me to be a better help meet.
Refining
He changed our lives completely. He put us through a refining process and led (read: forced) us down a different path, a narrow path, that we would never have chosen on our own. Looking back years later, we are fully thankful for that process as well as the outcome. The LORD is indeed good, and we can truly “rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5
About Jennifer Ross
I feel like I am in the middle of a trial right now. My husband just resigned from his job as worship leader at our church because we fell under some strong conviction about some of the things that were going on there. It was the church we had both grown up in. He is without a job at the moment and we are trusting the Lord to provide a job and finances. This post couldn’t have come at a better time to encourage me in being a support and encouragement for him. Thank you
Hi Brandi!
It is a blessing to know the Lord used this to encourage you! Our husbands really just need our love and support, and for us to continue to cheer them on! The guys really struggle when going thru financial trials, those are hard hits for them, as providers. We can keep their spirits up though by our kind and encouraging words. I’ll be praying for your family!
My husband has been unemployed for over 2 years now and I have had to learn how to encourage and exhort him in things that might seem small to others. It has been a journey for both of us but we have been taught so much! I think women need MORE of this topic. I was directed by God and His grace so many times when really I was at my end. Somehow, God just sent the right wisdom at the right time but to beable to learn from other women how to lift our husbands up and point them to God is essential in a marriage. My daughters are serving their father more because they see a change in me and we pray for him together daily as a family and that has been so amazing! I hate to say it, but I am not sure we would have seen the urgency to do that if we had not been desperate! I have so much to learn yet, but I am thankful for the rough times we have gone through that have given us a chance to grow closer to each other and God.
Grace to you and thank you for this post!
Heather, prayer can do more than we may ever realize! We (the children and I) pray for my husband daily as well. What a blessing you are to your man!!