Designer Baby Only, Please

By Contributing Writer, Bambi Moore

In just a few more weeks I won’t be able to see my toes.

It wasn’t long ago that the tiny punches and kicks were an intimate secret shared by my baby and I alone. Now they are forceful enough to be felt by the strong hands of daddy, as well as move my blouse. My fast-growing belly whacks the heads of unsuspecting children if they don’t get out of the way when they see me coming.

I love being pregnant. I don’t even mind the stares I get or the negative comments I sometimes receive. And this being my eighth child, I am no stranger to the third trimester aches, pains and misplaced center of gravity that I am about to embark on. Ah, yes… I know them very well. They don’t get me down the way they used to, because I don’t take life for granted the way I used to.  I know my childbearing days are numbered as well.

Sometimes I wonder if the baby I’m carrying could have a birth defect.  I declined the alfa fetoprotein testing offered to me to determine if my baby could have a chromosome defect. And at the ripe old age of 37, I am sure some may see that as irresponsible. But whether my baby has a defect or not (assuming that I trusted the results of this test, which I don’t) would not change the outcome of my pregnancy.  Therefore my husband and I decided that for us, the test was pointless. However, there may come a day that this testing is mandatory for all pregnant women. Why?

Because the physically imperfect are not considered worthy of life. Even that statement is no longer as shocking as it should be. We’ve heard it so many times. But how did we get to such a radical place? Has it really been that gradual?

Our society in general views children as objects of our own making. Once the birth control pill made its appearance 50 years ago  and was embraced by all, including the church, the message was clear: I, the mother, will determine when life is created. It was a pretty short walk from there to the abortion statistics we now see. We can do anything we want with  objects of our own making.

But the Bible teaches that children are a gift from Him: the Creator of life, the Giver of life and the Sustainer of life.

 

Search and Destroy

In North America right now, 92% of Downs Syndrome babies are aborted. Many predict that Downs babies will eventually be non-existent, as prenatal testing grows more advanced and abortions grow more accepted as the norm. Also chilling is that more and more babies are now being aborted for abnormalities such as cleft lip or palate, or club foot.  It’s the basis of evolutionary thought: the strong kill the weak.

But in Christ’s kingdom, the strong carry the weak.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
and before you were born I consecrated you; Jer. 1:5

If the Lord knew us before we were formed, He certainly knows us as He’s knitting us in our mother’s wombs. He knows our frame and He is the one, in His perfect wisdom, that ordains a plan for a human being, whether that includes a “whole” body and mind or not.

 

No Guarantees

Each one of my seven children have been born without any physical abnormalities. But if one or more of them had been, would I not still count them as blessings? Of course I would! What if one of them contract a terrible illness or have an accident that leaves them mentally challenged? While tragic, would that child then cease to be the blessing that he/she once was? A baby born to us physically perfect is no guarantee that he will always be that way. Furthermore, I know that the Lord may be pleased to give me a child with “special” needs anytime He desires. I have an abiding peace about that fact because I realize that the body is not as important as the soul.  Our bodies, whether physically capable or not, are only the temporary wrapping paper our souls are housed in.

 

Objections Answered

Many declare they are concerned about society’s cruel rejection of disabled children, and claim they are doing the child a kind favor by murdering it before it’s “miserable” life begins. But sad suicide statistics tell us that people are rejected every day for their weight, size, pimples, race and a multitude of other characteristics that set them apart in some way. (Of course, most of this comes during the school-age period, so just home school and you’ve settled that problem.)

Others worry about the financial expense or the emotional detriment to themselves. “I just couldn’t handle it.” In both cases, the Lord provides for us what we need, although many times not in advance, whether it be financially or spiritually. There have been many times in my mothering career that I have declared I just couldn’t handle one. more. thing. But when that one more thing came about, the Lord indeed gave me the grace to deal with the situation in a manner pleasing to Him.

Blessings of Special Needs Children

All children drive selfishness out of us. I have had to die a little more to myself with each child the Lord gives me.  But if you spoke to a mother of a disabled child and asked her why that child is a blessing to her, she would probably not say it’s because of her opportunity to bear her ”burden” in life of having a special needs child. Rather she is going to beam with maternal pride and joy just as any other mother would. She might testify that her child with special needs has a joy uncontainable, or a supernatural kind and forgiving spirit. She might say he has a precious innocence that warms her soul, or patience and perseverance that encourages her to work harder and be a better person than she was before. She may bear witness of her child’s loving and beautiful smile that never fades.

 

The Valley of the Shadow of Death

When I was fifteen years old I had the privilege of watching my mother give birth to my stillborn baby brother. Mom was the same age I am now and at the same point in pregnancy that I am now.

When the baby stopped being active, my mom grew concerned and called for an appointment with her doctor. For reasons we still do not know, the doctor discovered my brother had died in her womb a few days before.

The pitocin was begun.  We waited.

When he was born there was no urgency to suction his little mouth. Although his little body was perfectly formed, he was still and lifeless. The lungs never drew breath. The small pale form was never meant to pink up.

As a tubal reversal baby, there was never a more “wanted” child. There was a loving Christian home awaiting him.  But now he resides in a reality far greater than mine. For now, he beholds the Father’s face.

We left that hospital, my mom with a deserted womb and empty arms. It was such a painful trial. Raw agony for my parents. The Lord carried and comforted us all through the next days, weeks and months. He is near to those who have a broken heart (Ps. 34:18).

 

What purpose did the life of a 5 pound stillborn baby serve?

His life brought God glory in some way.  And all created life, no matter how brief or imperfect in body, is a result of the sovereign will of God and brings Him glory.

Just like my brother, I was born dead too. Not just disabled, sick or handicapped. But lifeless, breathless, stiff and cold. Because the Lord is merciful, He breathed the breath of life into me 25 years after my physical birth. Far more precious than our mortal, earthly bodies, are the immortal souls He creates, then grants faith, that they might live eternally.

 

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